Dueling with Stress

By Linda Bryant Caviness

Roller coasters! Some like them, some don’t. Are you an up-front-rider who thrills with the ups and downs and when the ride is over races back to the line to do it all over again? Or are you a white-knuckler—dreading the next jerk, turn, dip and drop while wishing you had never gotten yourself onto this stress rail in the first place?

How we relate to stress is unique to each of us, and we do well to understand our differences. But, common to all our needs, are ways to help us relate to stress in more advantageous ways than we are prone to do. Current research in stress management suggests that our mindset toward stress makes all the difference.

What Stress Can Do to Us

As leaders and families of leaders, stress can overtake us without our conscious awareness. It can eat away insidiously at our health and relationships while we are merely trying to keep up each day, Recognizing our vulnerability can help us ward off negative effects brought on too often by stress-producing expectations of service, family issues, financial obligations, etc.

Not uncommonly, the effects of stress are mistaken as illnesses, such as headaches, frequent insomnia, and lack of motivation. The Mayo Clinic website (December 29, 2019) warns that stress symptoms can affect your body, your thoughts and feelings, and your behavior. Being able to recognize common stress symptoms can help in manage them. Stress that’s left unchecked can contribute to many health problems, such as high blood pressure, heart disease, obesity and diabetes.

The Staff at Mayo Clinic (2019) recently published the following table dealing with impact on health when stressors are high.

Common Effects of Stress*

ON YOUR BODY - Heartache, Muscle tension or pain, Chest pain, Fatigue, Change in sex drive, Stomach upset, Sleep problems

ON YOUR MOOD - Anxiety, Restlessness, Lack of motivation or focus, Feeling overwhelmed, Irritability or anger, Sadness or depression

ON YOUR BEHAVIOR - Overeating or undereating, Angry outbursts, Drug or alcohol misuse, Tobacco use, Social withdrawal, Exercising less often

*Retrieved from https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-symptoms/art-200500987?p=1

The American Institute on Stress informs that 75 to 90 percent of visits to the doctor relate to issues centered on too much stress. More than 20 years ago Kawachi et al. suggested that sudden cardiac death was 4.5 times more likely when an individual lives in a state of sustained high stress.

For some, life today is even more stressful than it was 20 years ago. Yet, healthcare providers offer little or no support in coping with heightened stress. Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2013/02/07/the-most-stressed-out-generation-young-adults/#ixzz2KUBWUFNp

Spending hours a day on personal technology—particularly gaming—may be adding still to our already stressful lives. Stress default levels are rising among children and young adult groups. Spending hours daily dueling for supremacy with digital devils may be defeating regardless of our scoring prowess.

Stress in the Pastor’s Home
Though some leaders flourish under the public spotlight, their family members may just tolerate it and instead long for privacy. Susan Cain’s intriguing book Quiet: the power of introverts in a world that can’t stop talking will be a validating read for those who shy away from the public eye.

Regardless of personality differences, the church leader’s family is often stressed by the perception of “living in a fish bowl” and having to meet a world of others’ expectations. Stress common to the pastor’s and administrator’s family can compromise personal, family and community relationships, as well as the health and quality of our intimacy with and service to God. According to a recent statistics of Adventist workers mortality rate done by the NAD Retirement Department, it appears that pastoral ministry tends to offset the Blue Zone advantage Adventist are more prone to have.

Add these stressors to those common in everyday life, and the pastor’s family is target for psychological, behavioral, and relational trouble. Surely satanic powers are ready to take advantage of God’s partners under these conditions by creating turmoil, burn out, loss of relationships and health, overeating, depression, etc. (https://www.nadministerial.com/stories/2018/5/23/strategies-for-the-alleviation-of-stressors-in-pastors-families)

One hundred years ago, Ellen White targeted stress risks: “The relation that exists between the mind and the body is very intimate. When one is affected, the other sympathizes. The condition of the mind affects the health to a far greater degree than many realize. Many of the diseases from which men suffer are the result of mental depression. Grief, anxiety, discontent, remorse, guilt, distrust, all tend to break down the life forces and to invite decay and death. . . . Courage, hope, faith, sympathy, love, promote health and prolong life. A contented mind, a cheerful spirit, is health to the body and strength to the soul. ‘A merry [rejoicing] heart doeth good like a medicine.’” Proverbs 17:22. (Ministry of Healing, p. 241)

At another time White offered: “Ministers, teachers, students, and other brain workers often suffer from illness as the result of severe mental taxation, unrelieved by physical exercise.” http://www.whiteestate.org/books/mh/mh17.html

Stress results not only from strongly negative emotional states. Sitting at a computer or study desk for extended periods of time with minimal physical activity is stress producing as well. When denied whole-person function for long periods of time, cells and systems are taxed, producing even more stress. Physical, mental, and social/emotional/spiritual balance not only promotes health and cognition, it is a natural antidote to stress as well.

A Distinct Advantage

Maintaining focus on the “high calling” of church leadership is seminal to any discussion of stress in church administration. With Christ’s call to partnership come the fortifying forces of His Being as the Source of all Light, Life and Love—IF we daily take time for intimacy with Him. Confidence and joyfulness in this privileged calling is key to combating stress in Christian leadership.

Revelations in science help us better understand the powerful advantage of belief, love and trust—all of which are antithetical to gnawing stress and anxiety that too often define today’s world. In a TED Talk, titled How to Make Stress Your Friend, Kelly McGonigal, a health psychologist at Stanford University, cites research suggesting that “stress makes your heart pound, your breathing quicken and your forehead sweat. But while stress has been made into a public health enemy, new research suggests that stress may only be bad for you if you believe that to be the case.” McGonigal’s presentation tends to reiterate Ellen White’s 100-year-old counsels on this topic. (TED Talk: Youtube “How to Make Stress Your Friend” - https://www.ted.com/talks/kelly_mcgonigal_how_to_make_stress_your_friend?language=en)

Commutative Atmosphere Surrounding Us

Sustained stressful states impact more than just our own brain/body/heart. Our individual stress levels create physical impact on others near us also—in positive and negative ways we are just beginning to understand.

Paul J. Zak, professor of Economics at Claremont Graduate University’s School of Business, directs the Center for Neuroeconomics Studies (CNS), and at times he has taught neuroscience courses at Loma Linda University. Some ask ‘What does neuroscience have to do with economics?’ Dr. Zak responds, “The stock market is driven by pleasure, choice and trust. We want to understand trust better, so we study oxytocin, the love or trust hormone.”

Zak’s research considers how emotional states physically transfer from one person to another. He contends that when an individual is in a high state of love or trust, oxytocin can extrude from that person—perhaps through the breath or pores in the skin—creating a scent that others detect subconsciously through the olfactory sense, as in pheromone transfer. A bulb in our olfactory system is sensitive to the neurochemistry of others. Along with animals, we subconsciously sense and are affected by the emotional states of others through our sense of smell.

Your attitude or belief not only impacts every cell of your own being, it also physically impacts on others. If my trust or oxytocin level is high, others near me are influenced; and if they are receptive, even subconsciously, their oxytocin levels may rise responsively. Increased oxytocin levels are known to raise immune function and benefit respiration, digestion, cardiac function and cognitive processing.

Though oxytocin’s subconscious influence is typically positive, other neurochemical states—such as sustained high cortisol stress levels—also can transfer among individuals with negative effect.

It is well established that animals detect human fear and apprehension through the sense of smell, and insects mate via pheromone detection. Increasingly, science evidences that such transfer is common among humans as well. See also: http://www.ted.com/talks/paul_zak_trust_morality_and_oxytocin.html

Ellen White suggested a similar concept long before oxytocin research was conducted. Below are some of her comments.

“The influence of every man’s thoughts and actions surrounds him like an invisible atmosphere, which is unconsciously breathed in by all who come in contact with him. This atmosphere is frequently charged with poisonous influences, and when these are inhaled, moral-degeneracy is the sure result” (White, 1882, 5T, p. 111).

“There is a peculiar atmosphere surrounding every man’s soul, and those with whom they are associated are affected with this exhalation. There is a breathing in unconsciously this atmosphere which is often charged with poisonous miasma of habits and practices which are demoralizing. The greatest danger is when this poisonous atmosphere is not sensed and is unconsciously inhaled” (Manuscript Releases, V 20, p.51).

“By the atmosphere surrounding us, every person with whom we come in contact is consciously or unconsciously affected” (Reflecting Christ, p. 262).

Science now adds new definition to our understanding of the benefits of love and trust—concepts that Scripture has born out for centuries. Yet, the negative effects of stress not tended to by a sincere spirit of love and trust too often negates this benefit…

Ellen White offered: “The love which Christ diffuses through the whole being is a vitalizing power. Every vital part—the brain, the heart, the nerves—it touches with healing. By it the highest energies of the being are roused to activity. It frees the soul from the guilt and sorrow, the anxiety and care, that crush the life forces. With it come serenity and composure. It implants in the soul, joy that nothing earthly can destroy,--joy in the Holy Spirit,--health-giving, life-giving joy. . . . Our Savior . . . will do great things for those who trust in Him.” (E. G. White, Ministry of Healing, p. 115)

God’s Love is unparalleled in dealing with tension and cares. Energy flowing from Him is regeneratively peace-yielding and stress-reducing. The God of all Creation radiates His life eternal to us through Scripture, meditation and prayer. We benefit from that all-powerful energy by yielding—believingly, trustingly, and lovingly—to His Holy Spirit. Such intimacy sustains us through whatever ups and downs we experience. It is the love of God that most powerfully benefits us—especially in relieving stress.

Dueling with the Devil

As a church administrator, many stressful situations demanded my husband’s attention. Problems others could not solve often ended up on Larry’s desk. A favorite quote printed on cards to be shared with others was also on his desk. It was a stress-reducer from Ellen White, and Larry often recited it from memory:

“Whatever your anxieties and trials, spread out your case before the Lord. Your spirit will be braced for endurance. The way will be opened for you to disentangle yourself from embarrassment and difficulty. The weaker and more helpless you know yourself to be, the stronger will you become in His strength. The heavier your burdens, the more blessed the rest in casting them upon the Burden Bearer.

Worry is blind, and cannot discern the future; but Jesus sees the end from the beginning. In every difficulty He has His way prepared to bring relief. Our heavenly Father has a thousand ways to provide for us, of which we know nothing. Those who accept the one principle of making the service and honor of God supreme will find perplexities vanish, and a plain path before their feet.” (Desire of Ages, pp. 329, 330)

A dear friend, who is also a licensed counselor, cited to me a principle from Cognitive Behavior Therapy: the way you think effects the way you feel. If you want to change the way your feel, change the way you think.

Pastoral ministry will always be a potential stress producer. But no other profession is as imbued with advantage in overcoming life’s stressors as is an intimate pastoral partnership with God. Oneness with the Source of all true Light, Life, and Love allows us to duel with and overcome debilitating stress. Remember: a loving heavenly Father has your back, as well as your front and all other vulnerabilities. God’s love makes all the difference in dealing with the ups and downs of life. Trusting Him is stress relieving and others blessing—a major goal of ministry.